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staying grounded over the holidays

The holidays can be a wonderful time to reunite with your friends and family over food and festivities. They can also be a major source of stress for those of us who have strained relationships with our loved ones, food, mental health, or anything else. For the people who need a little extra support to get through the holidays unscathed — we’ve compiled a list of advice from our be.come community to share here along with our well wishes. We posed the question, “how do you stay grounded during the holidays?” and here is what we’ve found:

  • Know that it is OK to decline and say NO to events/situations you know will be toxic for you.

  • Set boundaries at the BEGINNING of a visit with your family.

  • Call your loved ones if you don’t get to see them for the holidays.

  • Start early and make a checklist – then stick to it!

  • Try setting your intentions for the day each morning.

  • Try to remember that eating what you love doesn’t hurt you and won’t “set you back.” Remember that the holidays are meant to be enjoyed and not a time to punish yourself.
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  • Don’t have any high expectations on how things SHOULD go.

  • Go with the flow as far as plans are concerned. Some family members are sticklers for certain traditions and expectations, so save yourself the frustration and don’t overthink it!

  • Cook or bake! Busy hands settle a busy mind, right?

  • Make sure to spend time alone. Whether that means getting yourself a hotel room instead of staying with your family, or just taking an hour out of every day to go read a book. Have an escape when you need a moment to yourself. For those of us with overstimulating families, it can feel overwhelming if you don’t honor your need for personal space.

  • Prioritize movement and quiet time. Whether it’s a walk, a be.come routine, or meditation! Give yourself a little time to work out your anxiety. It will leave you feeling a bit more in control of a busy (and beautiful) season.

"It’s essential not to feel guilty about communicating your boundaries and limits to friends and family. I am an adult. This is how I keep myself safe."

    • Try to protect how much of your time is going into obligations. As an adult, you’ll have to make compromises, but try to stay cognizant of how much you’re compromising your personal peace for obligatory events, people, etc. Then, make sure you’re peppering in enough things that bring you joy and help you maintain balance. Sometimes people can be a little forgetful of the boundary between our time and theirs.

    • Get in touch with nature. Whether it’s a snowy walk in Michigan or a morning swim in Melbourne, go soak in the beauty of the outdoors.

    • Keep essential oils with you and use them when you get overwhelmed; tap your heart center and breathe; feel your feet on the earth (if it’s not covered in snow).

    • Have a consistent bedtime and wakeup time. It helps!
  • Take a hot bath with some lit candles and your favorite album playing.

  • Stay up late to watch TV & movies.

  • NAPS!

  • Know that the decision not to spend the holidays with your family is OKAY. If it causes you too much stress to deal with your loved ones during the holidays, try skipping it and visit home around late January instead. Respect your own boundaries and accept the fact that holidays don’t have to equate to family if it doesn’t serve you. 

  • If you’re spending the holidays alone, consider volunteering to feed the homeless at a shelter. Everyone needs a little care this time of year — pay it forward! 

  • And remember, the be.come project is always there when you need it!

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