meet Jaclyn

meet Jaclyn

This is Jaclyn, she was a model for the be.come project’s first photo shoot, and has become a digital-friend of ours over the past year through check-in emails and progress reports. Her story is the reason we started the be.come project — to connect with others and make a meaningful impact on the way they talk about their body. We’re so grateful for Jaclyn, and you all, for sharing your stories with us.

Her first email to us…

“Hi! I am so excited that you are doing this! I am just going to get started with a little about myself…

My name is Jaclyn M., I’m 24 years old. I had my son when I was 19 via c-section. A few years after that, I got my first full time job– it’s completely sedentary and the hours are demanding. Long story short, I stopped exercising the way I used to and gained about 25 pounds in a year. I was so disappointed in myself and the way my body looked– I had gained weight AFTER I had a baby, not as a result of pregnancy.

For whatever reason, I was pretty ashamed of that. But then (thank God) the be.come project came into my life… to be honest, I went into this project hoping it would get me back on track to my “old” body, hoping it would help me lose weight. I had absolutely no idea how much this project would change my perspective.

Over the past year, the idea of being happy with my body the way it is was not at all possible for me. After doing be.come for 3+ months, I’ve started to realize that the extra weight I have literally means nothing… it doesn’t prevent me from doing amazing things… every time I do the project in just my sports bra, I become a little more comfortable in my skin. I’m actually proud of what this body has accomplished since January.

The be.come project is the first time I’ve committed to exercising since I was a Zumba instructor when my son was less than a year old, and I love it immensely. I still have a long way to go until I am totally comfortable in and loving of my body, but I’m so grateful to you and to be.come for helping me make such progress.

So here I am, stretch marks, flabby skin, and all! The idea of sending this is exciting and terrifying at the same time, so I know I have to do it. Thank you so much for everything.”

Their follow up after our photo shoot helped us believe we were on to something good here…

“I cannot thank you enough for today! I feel really proud to have been a part of the be.come photo shoot, and I’m so grateful to you for allowing us to be such a big part of your business. The atmosphere today was incredible and made doing something completely new and out of my comfort zone actually feel natural.”

With every email, she shared with us the ways in which she saw and felt her body becoming stronger and truly embodied the spirit of be.come…

“I had a lot of muscle memory with this one so it felt really good! I felt really stable in the lunge series which is unusual for me in my first session so that was awesome. Also got so much more height in my waist during the side leg series, and didn’t drop down when bringing my leg into my chest (I used to always feel my waist slightly brush against the ground at that part). Honestly can’t believe how much stronger I have gotten from the last time I did this routine!”

And a few days ago, just shy of one-year from our first meeting at the photo shoot, this is what she has to say…

“It feels so special that this week’s routine was the number one fan favorite! Even though I have grown to love some other lunge series maybe even a little more than the one in this routine, it will just always hold such a special place in my heart as the first be.come routine I ever did! And now the third time around, that warm up is soooo smooth and yummy and amazing!!

It’s difficult to put into words how grateful I am for what you have given me this past year. You and be.come helped me make a commitment to my body that I had not been able to make in a long time. Every time I do a routine I feel like I am putting myself first, and I feel really really good about that. Be.come put me in a totally different mindset and encouraged me to make healthier life choices all around, both physically and mentally. I love the time I spend on myself by doing be.come because it makes me feel like my physical and mental health are worth something! It’s honestly incredible, this year has been life-changing and I cannot thank you enough!!

I hope you have a wonderful New Year. I can’t wait to see what incredible and inspiring things you achieve in 2019!

Thank you thank you thank you!!!”

The point of us sharing her story isn’t to pat ourselves on the back for what the project has done, but to tell you — the nervous new client, or the long-time user stuck in a rut, or anyone who needs to hear it — it. gets. better. Both your body will get stronger, and your mind will become more forgiving and suddenly you’ll realize you were made for this, you can do it.

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a better before and after

a better before and after

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Most of you know by now how much I dislike “before and after” photos being used as a way to display health. I’ll never forget when one of my friends was complaining about her weight. I’d tell her she looked great (she did), and she would say she wasn’t as skinny as she had been the previous summer. 

I finally looked at her and said, “do you remember last summer? You had just broken up with your long time partner, you were depressed and not eating. I came to your house one day and made you get out of bed, shower and take a walk outside because you couldn’t do it alone. You were working out rigorously to the point of exhaustion. Yes, you were really skinny, but you were also really sad.”

My friend was using her “skinniest weight” as a benchmark for her “goal weight”, but in the end, it was unrealistic — her thinnest so happened to also be her saddest. If she scrolled back through insta, I’m sure she could find herself looking seemingly happy and toned (we only post the glossy stuff) but if she inspected closer, she would see that sadness brimming through her eyes. 

So, this is why I don’t like before and after pictures. Too easy to lie. Not to mention lighting, camera angles, poses etc etc. Side note: I am however a fan of movement progression videos. I would love to see some of you film your favorite sequences now, and then film them again after 3 months of be.coming. You’ll be surprised at how much smoother your body is able to move. Just a thought. 

Anyway, what sparked me to write this (and I WILL be writing more notes from bethany once things are operating at a smooth pace) is an email I received from a client named Chelsea. Chelsea is the model front and center in the photo when you open the app (you know, the one with the three women looking like badasses). She started doing be.come during the January beta project and when I asked for people to model for the website, Chelsea was one of my favorite submissions. 

Her email was basically like “WTF AM I DOING SENDING IN A PIC OF ME IN MY UNDERWEAR. I’M SO SCARED BUT ALSO PICK ME”. Okay, not exactly that, but her email was really vulnerable and honest. She talked about not being there yet, but still really working hard on the self-love thing, and that doing be.come beta had helped. 

When Chelsea arrived to the shoot I saw the most beautiful spark in her. I really can’t explain it, but something about her soul spoke to me. I watched her become more and more comfortable in her skin during the few hours she was with me. It was pretty amazing. And now, of course, Chelsea is one of my most used faces for be.come. 

I recently received the following email and photos from Chelsea. 

“Okay I have to share this with you. When I got married at the end of January and we got our pictures back I couldn’t even LOOK AT MYSELF. I was in such a dark place….Today I looked through the pictures again & NOW I can only see how happy and in love I was with my husband. I can’t thank you enough for the mindset shift that you and the project have brought me. Slowly but surely loving myself more every day.”

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THIS is what a before and after picture should be. Being able to look at a photo of yourself that you once hated, and now being able to look at it with love. THIS is the change we are making. THIS is what be.come is about. 

I love you all. Thanks for bearing with me as we’ve been working on app updates. There have definitely been some roadblocks this week but I’m doing all I can. Have the best week

xx – bcm

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chelsea: be.coming a model

chelsea: be.coming a model

A little back story/about me:

I know you have eyes and can see me, but here I am – I’m a short fat lesbian with the flattest pancake ass, & comically large boobs. Do I see myself represented in the fitness world? Absolutely NEVER. So, maybe this is the chance to be the representation I’d so love to see!

I have PCOS which is an endocrine disorder that wrecked havoc on my body. In my twenties, I gained an extreme amount of weight very quickly, for seemingly no reason, before I was diagnosed. Couple that with some of the other symptoms – hair loss on the head, hair growth on the chin/upper lip, and acne – sounds fun right – and it created a recipe for me to truly HATE my body. Hate. HAAAAAATTTTTEEEEEEE.

The weight gain was particularly hard because I spent my whole life dancing. I started when I was 4 & never stopped. I spent 8+ hours a day after school dancing, being captain of my cheerleading squad & spent weekends at dance competitions. I took dance classes all through college & did many dance related events with my sorority. I was SO active!

After the weight gain, I couldn’t move my body in the way I was used to & it put me in a really nasty funk for years. I felt like I was out of control & like my body was rebelling against me. It was such a powerless place to be.

Fast forward to November 2017: I was scrolling on Instagram & saw a dance class that looked so fun – all the lights off, party lights on – basically like being in the club. So even though I was scared, I signed up – I figured I didn’t have much to lose. I am SO grateful that I did because those classes have changed my life!

I worked my way up building my endurance & stamina over the past 5 months, also adding in yoga, & am now spending about 2-3 hours daily between yoga, dancing, & PT to address some old injuries. And you know what? I feel AMAZING!

I was traveling a lot in March so I signed up for the Be.come Project because it was something I could do anywhere & it was like a lightbulb went off! Watching/doing those routines (and soaking in the incredible amount of grace, support, & encouragement provided in them) made me adjust my thinking.

I’ve stopped obsessing over how much I HATE how my body looks & started being proud of it for all the hard work it does. 5 months ago I could barely get through 1 hour of class & was exhausted – now I bust through 3 hours with ease! I particularly loved the Be.come routines because they were simple but effective – they showed me that my body COULD do those things, but also if there was something I wasn’t quite ready for, I could modify it to make it work for me until I was ready. It was magical!

Do I love my body? Yes! It allows me to live my dream life in NYC & for that alone I appreciate it. Do I love the way it looks? Hellllllll to the no. But that’s ok – I’m a work in progress & everyday is a new chance to be more gentle with myself.

I’d like to be a part of this to show that you can be fat & active – and maybe even beautiful? I NEVER see my body type represented in fitness, which is sad because I know there’s lots of us out there who are fat, active, & HEALTHY!

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alexa: be.coming a model

alexa: be.coming a model

alexa

My name is Alexa. I am 29 year old. I lived 22 years with an undiagnosed celiac disease causing me to gain weight, which led to teasing, which brought on depression and anxiety. I didn’t know that I had toxic gluten levels that were causing these weight and mood imbalances, but I knew that I didn’t know anyone my age who suffered physical and mental pain. I always felt ostracized.

I came from a small country town in upstate NY where I tried to promote individuality (I had a mohawk during high school, wore combat boots, and tutu’s with my plugs). Needless to say, I never fit in.

I am bisexual, I am heavily tattooed, I have body modifications, I have self inflicted scars (from before my diagnosis), I have been the victim of domestic abuse (the peace sign on my ribs is a purple domestic violence awareness tattoo). My clavicle bone and second rib are now permanently displaced from the abuse I endured.

Once properly diagnosed, I was able to regulate my diet to suit my body’s needs. I lost the weight I had gained and am in the best mental state of my life. However now, I get ridiculed for being too skinny or told I need to eat more. This leaves me to explain my condition or say nothing at all. It’s ironic how I got scrutinized as a child for being “overweight” and now as an adult I get scrutinized because I am “underweight”. This just goes to show how much society and our culture needs to change its perspective.

The be.come project has helped me feel less insecure not using equipment in my workouts and instead relying on my body. (I always felt like sports and gyms were the only way to be fit). I have always felt the most comfortable in home, dressed in underwear, upside down with my head on the ground and feet in the air, stretching my body in different manners. I have always been made fun of because I do this daily. When I had roommates they would make fun of me, when I get off planes and do it in the airport, I get stared at, etc. I never understood why it was weird to move myself in a way that felt most natural.

Instagram and social media has been flooded with fitness people who are promoting body building almost like a competition. Promoting unhealthy substances to put in our bodies to make them something else, instead of using what our bodies were given naturally. I believe there is still a stigmatism about working out in an organic manner rather than one revolving around large weights and a Smith machine.
The be.come project is building a community that fights that stigmatism and promotes a healthy, loving relationship with your body and the movements it’s capable of. You (and the be.come) have made me realize that I am not alone in my journey towards embracing my mind, body, and soul naturally.

I just want to say THANK YOU. Thank you for being you. Thank you for being such a positive beam of light and helping others to be.come their own. We live in a society where people are told from their birth what they are and who they are supposed to be. If they don’t fit these very specific roles, they’re scrutinized and are left feeling guilty of themselves. Which is completely ludicrous. I am so grateful that you have inspired woman (and men) to be.come their true selves (despite what they’re being told to be). You are such an inspiration and I wanted to take a moment to tell you how much I (and we ALL) appreciate what you’re doing. It’s truly beautiful. You are truly beautiful.

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